A Bug’s Life

If a non-flying bug reaches anywhere above the second floor of a building, I let them live.

I don’t even like taking the stairs more than one flight. If the bug climbs to these heights, they deserve to be spared.

However, if it’s in my apartment, I’ll make them pay rent.

Songbird Of The Generation

I’ve been listening to more music so I’m going to talk about more music.

I’m going to talk about the song “Forever” by Drake.

You know, the song that goes:

Last name ever, first name greatest, like a sprained ankle boy I ain’t nothing to play with.

That didn’t just have Drake. Eminem was also on that song. Oh, and so was Kanye. Excuse me, did I also mention Lil Wayne?

Drake. Eminem. Kanye. Lil Wayne.

These are four of the best rappers EVER.

This is like Michael Jackson, Stevie Wonder, John Lennon, and Billy Joel on the same song.

Can’t forget to mention, Lebron James is on the song’s cover art.

Greatness.

Honorable Mention

Swagger Like Us has T.I., Jay-Z, Kanye, and Lil Wayne.

Rate Yourself

Everyone showers. Everyone brushes their teeth. Everyone masturbates. I hope.

But how good are you at these things?

Do some self-reflecting. Rate yourself on the below things. Because only you really know your rating.

• Are you good at brushing your teeth?
• Are you good at showering?
• Are you good at sleeping?
• Are you good at masturbating?
• Are you good at washing your hands?

Thanks For The Memories

I guarantee that this quote will bring you back to childhood.

“You are the weakest link. Goodbye!”

Another quote?

“Smoking or non-smoking?”

Trapped In The Closet

Everyone keeps a few shirts in their closet juuuust in case they lose weight.

White Tank Top

A white tank-top undershirt. It has two names:

• Wife Beater
• Guinea Tee

One describes people who strike women, The other is a derogatory term toward Italians.

It’s time for a re-brand.

Sticky Icky

Did any actually use ‘Sticky Keys’? Does anyone know what it does? Is it still a feature on modern computers?

Brooooooklyn

I ate a slice of pizza. I ate said pizza in Brooklyn. This slice of pizza is how I’d define Brooklyn.

Pizza on pizza for pizza’s sake.

 

#ExpandTheBrand